Back in the day, it was a compliment to be called a lady. Surely anyone would rather be called a lady over a tramp (or worse). A lady has class, she has manners, she knows how to dress, and makes a good wife.
For me personally, I hate being called a lady. Unless the person calling me a lady is my grandmother. I doubt she would though. She would probably say that if I was a real lady I'd be married with two kids by now. Even though feminists would argue how people and society at large are infantilizing women in general and turning pre-teens into sex objects and older women into pre-teens, I'd still rather be called a girl than a lady.
I was in a lineup the other day at the coffee shop. The little girl was behind me asking her mom when their turn was. The mom replied, "After this lady then it's our turn." I physically cringed. Geez, when did I become a lady?! I guess I am not as young as I thought I was anymore. Maybe I won't get many more opportunities of being giddy after being carded at casinos, clubs, and liquor stores. Ok, so maybe I do look younger than my actual age (being Asian helps a bit), but as the number climbs upwards I'm starting to feel irrationally reluctant about admitting how old I am. I just want them to think I'm as old as I look and not have to correct them and damage my ego at the same time.
Then last week, another person referred to me as "that lady." Maybe they meant it in a polite way, better than being referred to that old hag, but there are times I wouldn't mind being called "that girl" for a few years more. I know for myself, I usually refer that l-word for my aunts and kind-looking grannies. Just something to think about for those men who think of it as a complimentary term of endearment. It's too soon to call your wife a "swell lady" if she is under 50 (but don't call her a "girl" either if it's preceded by old - you will pay for it later).
And on a totally different note, I'm reading this book called Classy: Exceptional Advice for the Extremely Modern Lady. Not earth shattering advice, but fun read nonetheless. From table manners to how to avoid cell phone sex photos from leaking online, it's pretty evident that we're far from the ladies of our mother's generation.
2 comments:
This is hilarious and I totally agree! I really dislike the word lady for myself. Also because my mom used to always tell me to dress and act like a lady when I was younger and I was a tomboy, haha. But I think being in your late 20s/early 30s is an awkward age as being a woman but sometimes feeling like a girl. I'm 34, married with 3 kids and I still feel more like a girl than a woman or a lady so I know what you mean. There isn't a good word that fits for this inbetween stage. Some people say chick but I don't like that word either.
lols so recognisable. I was called m'am the other day. Me m'am??? Who needs to show ID when buying baileys T.T (NL = alcohol 16 years, strong liquor 18)
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